Position Terminated

So I have been up and down on what seems to be a downward spiral..... Let's just talk facts... After two years, my company is letting me go... They called me into a meeting and sprung it on me- I was hurt... they started by saying- please know this has nothing to do with your performance, we love having you with us BUT we are down sizing and have decided to terminate your position... This leaves you with two options-

1) We will give you a severance package if you choose to leave which includes 18 months of schooling on us

2) You can apply for one of two positions available, IF you interview and we select you, you will change locations but still be within the company

My heart fell through the chair... I couldn't speak- my mind froze and her words seemed to physically HURT- it took all of 3 min to say that to me- to devastate my world and after all that I realized that their day would go back to normal and mine would forever change... But she did utter that I have 2 weeks notice and my last day would be the 31st if I left the company...

The only thing I could think to do was nothing- I didn't fight back because there was nothing I could do- Then my boss called me in for my 2 year review which I thought was not appropriate timing but I did want to know what she thought of my service with the company- All I cared about was how she felt I had done since I know I busted my ASS for the past year with countless efforts and covering for people, going above and beyond what I should do.... She gave me the song and dance and gave me 3-5% when the max is 10% and last year I got 7%... My feelings were gone... I didn't want to hear anything or anyone... I was a mess and I resented her for kicking me while I was down with such a bogus claim of "you MEET but don't EXCEED expectations"

I picked up what was left of me and went home... I called Whoa to tell him as I tried to walk out with some pride and he helped me see the BIGGER picture... he was 100% supportive and I don't think I would see things this way if not for him.... He helped me look at my options and later came over just to make sure I was ok... I called my parents after and the funny thing is- they ALL said the same thing... Having the support of my fam AND boyfriend really got me going and thinking- I have to make this work! I have been going to church lately and I feel like I really need to have some FAITH- I went in to work the next day- Yesterday- with a plan. First was to take care of my co-workers... the ones I would leave behind... They were upset to hear but I didn't cry at all- I told them all that they would be FINE... that God doesn't close a door without opening one and now was MY TIME to find that new door- I told them they could come to me for help and support on anything until the day I leave and that I was more than willing to train them... Then I sent out emails to my team... telling them my decision... I told them all how wonderful they are and how blessed I feel to have had the chance to work with them... That i know we are all up in arms about this but we will all manage something.... I also wrote the director to thank her for her time and the opportunity but that I would have to decline the interview.... She thanked me.... (although she was cold and rude when she was telling me I was DONE- I want to go out with CLASS and that's something that THEY can't take from me).

My next order of business was to call HR, IRS, take care of school docs and file everything needed... I think I have set myself up to be ok- I hope so... and I want to use this time to follow my heart... I want to throw myself into the production and modeling I love so much- This may be the push I need... and if not- I will find something else. I'm a fighter... I still have a week and a half to finalize things at work and beyond that- God won't leave me out in the cold..... We shall see... Faith is not about what you see... It's about trusting what you can't... Believeing in something greater, BIGGER.... And I am really starting to understand that- There is a reason I have been led back to church at this point in my life- My guess is that he knew I would need him desperately at a time like this... And so I will continue to believe and show faith and pray and see this as a test...